I was reading the May issue of Glamour last night at the gym, when I came across an article that seemed like it would be revolutionary to spring/summer and the implied quest to get out of our winter skin and into our bikini body. It’s called “Good News! You can flatten your belly Fast.” It promises to reveal your sexiest tummy in days, without dieting. Sound too good to be true? It is. Glamour then proceeded to provide me with these useless tips to get rid of tummy pooch quickly.
1.Drink more water, so your body is hydrated and doesn’t try to absorb water from your food, which causes bloating.
2. Do something every day to relieve stress to prevent stress related food binging
3. Eat a little fat every day (sounds counterintuitive, no?), but eating a diet entirely stripped of fat can cause your body to lose it’s ability to digest fat, and make you crave fatty foods (true).
4. Tweak the way you breathe so you don’t push your belly out when you inhale
5. Get at least 7 hours of sleep a night to keep from throwing your hunger hormones out of whack
6. Cut back on artificial sweetners and carbonated drinks
7. Stand up straight.
Well Glamour, I already drink lots of water. I’m not stressed. I don’t eat exclusively non-fat. I know how to breathe. I get 8 hours of sleep most nights. I don’t drink soda or eat faux sugar. AND I happen to have great posture. Can we get some useful tips? And by the way, no one wants to see Lauren Conrad on the cover of a magazine. I guess the only way to get flat abs is through good old fashioned exercise. Good thing there's a really cute personal trainer at my gym!
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